Honeck's tips include:
• Talk -- Talk, talk talk. Money like sex is still a taboo topic and we often don't have a clear idea about how our partner thinks or feels about money.
• Find Balance -- Balance power around money. One person making all the decisions and having all the control is a recipe for disaster. Find ways for you both to be equally engaged in all money decisions.
• Make Decisions -- Decide together what is mine, yours and ours. Most couples have their own hybrid system for what works best. Find the one that is best for both of you.
• Define Your System – Have a clearly defined money management system all the way from who handles the mail to who sends out the checks. Without a well thought-out operational plan, things fall through the cracks.
• Address Problems – When things get tough, address problems immediately (no secrets allowed). Avoiding the issue only makes it more toxic and drives a wedge in the relationship.
• Perform Checkups – Schedule an annual money checkup with each other. Things change and just like our physical health, money management needs an annual checkup to keep it healthy and relevant.
• Talk a Little More -- Talk, talk and talk some more. The most important thing is to have open communication with no blame and shame. We all have hang-ups around money. Treat your partner with compassion.
"At the end of the day, couples need not argue about money," Honeck adds. "And it's not just about communication. It's about making a plan, and sticking to it together. Information gives you power over your finances. Not talking about them, not making a plan and not coordinating as a team makes you a victim of your finances. If you control your finances, they will never control you or your marriage."