Are you feeling sad, life seem to be getting you down? Don’t fight the feeling, do something positive to break the pattern.
The stronger those bad feelings are, the more frustrated you are likely to become. That’s why killers kill; they let a feeling of anger become intense. It’s why people who commit suicide finally just give in to those negative feelings. They allow those negative feelings to grow, and one day there is no more hope left, they give up, jump off of cliffs, or jump in front of trains as one of my school mates did recently.
Want to know a guaranteed cure to break the pattern? Begin to pray, and call on God. If you must, lie down on the floor and stretch your arms out to God, with your face down to the floor. Become as humble as a new born baby, and pray. I mean you must really pray sincerely and from your heart.
Secondly, realize negative momentum, is building and do something that you enjoy. After you have prayed, knock those negative thoughts and feelings off track by exercising faith in God, and do something that will renew you. It doesn’t matter how bad it is, an enjoyable activity always helps.
By focusing on negativity, problems escalate. Instead, render them irrelevant. Turn your attention in a radically different direction, focus on positives.
For example, a close friend of mine shared her experience with me. Her husband, a successful attorney, who owned his own law practice, had an affair with one of his female attorney’s. Every night, he went to her home, but would never spend the entire night. He always came home, very late. Year after year, he would come home late at night, get into bed and never say a word about the other life he was leading, and neither did his wife. The two of them acted as if nothing was happening!
He gave his wife gifts and provided full financial support. Although it did not give her the happiness she desired, it did cause her to come to the decision that she would never leave her husband. She felt sooner or later, he would stop his affair, and they could begin again.
While she waited, she found positive things to do in her life. She went back to college and earned her PhD in Education; she traveled around the world, and yes, he paid for everything. None of these things made her happy in her marriage, but the positive activities allowed her the opportunity to get some joy in her life.
She became outrageously positive. In fact, on one of her trips to South Africa, she was crowned an African princess. She started to laugh and enjoy her life. She was funny and creative and ridiculous and joyful all at the same time.
The couple stayed married and the affair ended. The husband loved and treasured his wife, and now some 30-40 years later, the marriage is alive and well. They attend church together, they study the bible together, and he continues to shower her with gifts. Anything he can do as a husband for his wife, he does. She did exactly what the scripture says, in Ephesians 4:31-32, Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ, God forgave you.
What a wonderful example of what can happen if you really believe in your husband, still love your husband, and though he may be out there, as long as he is still caring for the family, if you can stay there, pray and wait on God. If he’s really your husband, he will come back home.
You too can be joyful and happy; and when you do, you’ll create great new reasons to smile.
Lyndia Grant is a speaker and writer who lives in the Washington metropolitan area. She can be reached at 202-518-3192; email: