A+ R A-

Blaming Bobby Brown

Rate this item
(150 votes)
Blaming Bobby Brown Courtesy Photo

Fifteen years ago, none of us would have guessed that in 2012, Bobby would be remarried, the father to a young child and (allegedly) sober for years and that Whitney would die alone in the Beverly Hills Hotel with Xanax and an uneaten turkey sandwich by her side. Many had hoped that the end of what seemed to be the toxic Bobby and Whitney marriage would signal the rebirth of the latter's career and her health. That was not to be the case.

Before Real Housewives of Atlanta and Basketball Wives lowered the threshold for what is considered to be acceptable on-screen behavior, there was Bravo's Being Bobby Brown. The hit series, which ran but one fateful season, took a look into the life of the aging R&B star, his children and, most notably, his drug-addled wife Whitney Houston. It was a train wreck and impossible to look away. On one hand, you had the loving father who doted on other kids from the family as much as he did his own, the tender relationship between mother and daughter and the undeniably powerful bond that kept Bobby and Whitney together for 15 years. But then you had the once-powerful couple looking high as a kite, swimming in booze and talking as if they had no concept of cameras and fame (a particular low came via Brown recalling the time he helped his wife pull a stubborn piece of you-know-what from her rectum). For many viewers, the show served as a confirmation: that Negro from Boston had ruined our pretty, pretty princess.

Bobby Brown met Whitney Houston at the 1989 Soul Train Awards, the same year she was booed there by an audience that didn't yet find her pop sound "Black" enough to warrant inclusion in such a Black event. The two very shortly thereafter became inseparable and were married in a 1992 ceremony that made jaws drop across the land. Whitney, as we knew her before Bobby, was classy and stunning and sober. Whitney after the couple's marriage was loud, defiant and, later, troubled. Thus, Brown must have been to blame.

It's curious how few folks considered Whitney's choice of husband to be a reflection of who she was all along. No, I'm not saying that she was always into drugs and always bent on self-destruction. But there has never been any concrete proof that Brown rolled up at that woman's castle on a chariot filled with dope and Marlboros and turned her out. Yet that is the narrative so many of us have clung to for the better part of two decades.

The couple's "Something In Common" was often used as a joke-the something MUST be crack, HA! -but it actually seemed to be a message to those who didn't understand how two people who looked so different from the outside could be in love. This is where the public's inability to understand branding comes in. Both these kids where from the hood, both experienced fame at a very early age...yet one was molded by a svengali who dressed her in gowns and touted her as a Black Miss America who could sing her face off, while the other's wild antics ended up pulling him from a popular boy band and made him a solo star. Bobby touted his isms, Whitney hid hers. But they were there all along.

As dream hampton mentions in her loving lament for the late diva, industry folks always knew that Houston was "more Newark Black church girl than the debutante" Clive Davis sold us. She and Bobby made sense in ways we may not have instantly recognized, but to reduce their story to that of a guy from the wrong side of the tracks getting a good girl hooked on drugs and booze does both parties a great disservice. And it does absolutely nothing to bring Whitney back.

This is a devastating time for Bobby Brown, as he has lost one of the great loves of his life and the mother of his daughter (Brown's father also passed away last December and his mother, in early 2011). For a recovering addict, this is a dangerous space, one that could very easily lure someone back into the throes of substance abuse. As we do not know now and likely never will if Brown truly introduced Whitney to habits that devastated her career and eventually claimed her life, we owe it to him, to her and to Bobbi Kristina NOT to saddle him with the responsibility for the great tragedy that has occurred.


Jamilah Lemieux is the News and Lifestyle editor for EBONY.com.

Last modified on Tuesday, 14 February 2012 22:27

222 comments

  • h johnson

    Poor Whitney and Michael. Death was the ONLY way they could rest in peace. The media, so called friends and people who said yes to any and everything is what killed their spirits. Criticizing every single thing they did. Whitney in an interview asked for prayer. Nobody heard that part. We knew there was a problem. Did we keep her and Michael held in prayer? I feel as though they were let down by so many. They gave us the precious gifts that GOD gave them. (Beautiful music) Why wasn't that enough? My wish is that if you know someone with an addiction, CHALLENGE THEM! Don't just sit back and whisper! Through it all I believe Whitney knew the Lord and that will sustain her mom. I am so glad that she is with someone that loves her unconditionally and she nor Michael will NEVER again have to worry about what other people think or say! They are finally Resting in Peace!

    h johnson Wednesday, 22 February 2012 22:44 Comment Link
  • Keymn

    один Сдаю 1 Сдаю 2 [url=http://nf-ussr.ru/2010-03-08/49992.php]КУПЛЮ КВАРТИРУ ОКОЛО ТАНДЕМА ПАРК ХАУСА ИКС ЭЛЯ МЕГГИ РАМСТОРА 8[/url] [url=http://nf-ussr.ru/2010-03-26/39137.php]Сдается 1 ком. кв. Есть все![/url]

    Keymn Wednesday, 22 February 2012 22:16 Comment Link
  • renee gleaves

    I agree that you all are blaming the wrong person Bobby Brown loved Whitney yes they had their issues; but he never forced whitney to do anything, a few interviews i have seen with whitney she new bobby did not MAKE her do anything and she knew where she was from and key thing she said stuck with me she said he allowed her to be HERSELF! not a ball gown wearing princess that clive davis portrayed her to be. If anyone to blame its the media how would you feel if you are fighting demon and everytime you open a magazine or her news coverage about you its always negative stop pointing at bobby and take a look at yourselves! I love you B. Brown Love you WHitney rip!

    renee gleaves Wednesday, 22 February 2012 19:22 Comment Link
  • Sabrina

    It is never easy to accept a loss. it's human nature to want to find someone or something to blame. In different interviews Whitney states SHE was her own devil,that no one made her do anything that SHE did not want to do. Whitney took responsibility for her own bad judgement and short comings. Like many of you have said we have all been introduced to something that we know is not good for us and we make the decision to accept or deny. We should then ask ourselves "IF" this person really cares about me why would they offer me anything that is ultimately no good for me?

    Sabrina Wednesday, 22 February 2012 18:51 Comment Link
  • William Holloway

    Whitney was 48...not 4 or 8..Close friends like Chaka Khan (a recovering addict herself six years) and Jennifer Holliday state that Whitney was doing drugs before she met Bobby Brown and that they are prevelant in the industry..It is hard to kick when two addicts are together..Bobby hit his rock bottom when he saw his marriage was over and his daughter was gone and he knew the next stop was the grave...He made a CHOICE to get clean and sober and his sobriety is a fact..Sadly Whitney had a choice..Bobby even called one of her interventionists to their home to find her in her walk - in closet full of crack pipes that belonged to her..One of the things that ruined her voice..What about her yes ma'am entourage who gave her whatever she wanted so they would not get fired..And the doctors who prescribed all those meds anytime she asked..They are under Police investigation...She is gone and the blame game needs to stop..Bobby has stated in an interview his responsiblity but he got clean, why did'nt she choose her daughter, career, and her life instead of chasing the next high..Only her, those pills and that drink were in that bathroom...AND SATAN...He did not get her spirit, but sadly he got her body..Bobby is reaching out to Bobby Kristina and now the Houston family must get past their resentment and do what is best for her and the first thing is to stop denying her father access to her..She is 18 years old...

    William Holloway Wednesday, 22 February 2012 16:02 Comment Link
  • metro

    I think you are blaming the wrong Bobby. DeNiro dated her for years before she met Brown. Just saying...she could have picked up drugs anywhere in Hollywood or the Music Industry. Clive Davis is mostly to blame if blame could bring her back. She was a meal ticket to a lot of folks. Who would end the free ride with an intervention????

    metro Wednesday, 22 February 2012 14:42 Comment Link
  • virtuous13

    I am having a hard time with all of the press, media, especially us (African Americans folk) criticizing Bobby Brown in the death of Whitney. Let he that is without sin, cast the first stone; these articles, television critics, etc. THE WORLD did not say one iota of concern to WHITNEY, where all this may have made a difference, too late now, that is the sadest reality for me. We add insult to injury here, no one will get to the healing side until we STOP JUDGING AND SET AN EXAMPLE. NO BLAME GAME HERE, REAL TALK, REAL LIFE. WHITNEY'S FAMILY SUFFERS FROM DRUG ADDICTION WAY BEFORE BOBBY BROWN, JUST FOR THE RECORD! NO THEY DID NOT COMPLIMENT EACH OTHER IN THAT AREA, HOWEVER, GOD STEPPED IN, BOBBY GOT HELP, WHITNEY WAS ON HER WAY TO GET IT; THEIR DAUGHTER IS ONLY DOING WHAT SHE SAW HAPPEN IN THE HOME. NO ONE LIKES TO BE JUDGED, RIDICULED, AND ERRRBODY TALKED ABOUT WHITNEY, EVEN THIS EDITOR AT ONE POINT. SO I FEEL WE SHOULD TRY AND GET IN SOLUTION MODE HERE AND START WITH FCC REGARDING PRIVACY AND RIGHTS OF CELEBS. THIS NEVER TOOK PLACE BACK IN THE DAY, YOU COULD NOT POST HALF OF WHAT'S PRINTED AND REPORTED TODAY, PEOPLE AIR EVERYTHING AND WORDS HURT, SO IT WOULD BE SAFE TO SAY THAT EDITORS, REPORTERS, NEWS KILLED WHITNEY'S SPIRIT EVERY TIME SHE RELAPSED. I HAVE BEEN CLEAN FOR 25 YEARS, 48 YRS OLD AND AFRICAN AMERICAN, IT CAN BE DONE, HOW IS IT ONLY WHITE FOLKS GET THE PRAISES AND PASSES WHEN THEY HAVE ISSUES AND HARD TIMES, AND BLACK FOLK GET BASHED AND THROWN UNDER THE BUS W/O SUPPORT FROM THEIR OWN FOLKS, INCLUDING WHITNEY'S EMPLOYEES AND FAMILY, NO ONE DID ANYTHING TO HELP HER, YOU HEARD NIKKI ON DR. DREW SHE DIDN'T WANT TO GET CUT OFF, IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE IT DOESN'T MATTER ABOUT GETTING CUT OFF. PEOPLE WHO MATTER DON'T JUDGE, AND PEOPLE WHO JUDGE DON'T MATTER.

    virtuous13 Wednesday, 22 February 2012 09:41 Comment Link
  • only Gods rules really matter

    in God's eyes we are responsible for our own actions..if someone offered you drugs wouldn't you walk away from that person if you have never done that drug before..

    in God's eyes all sin is the same and there is no one sin that is worse than another..so if you hve sinned then it's nthg u can really say about bobby or whitney

    we all hve sinned and come short of the glory so he who is without sin throw the first stone.

    we miss you whitney

    only Gods rules really matter Wednesday, 22 February 2012 05:33 Comment Link
  • Teena

    I agree with the writer of this article. I have tried different drugs when I was younger. I think most people have, whether it's peer pressure or whatever. I chose to try or not try. Indulge in certain drugs and not indulge in others. So unless Bobby tied Whitney down, put the pipe, blunt or glass to her mouth...she made choices people! And it's its hard to make someone inhale, BTW. Stop blaming Bobby!

    Teena Wednesday, 22 February 2012 04:35 Comment Link
  • Dana

    Amen......

    Dana Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:42 Comment Link

Leave a comment

Make sure you enter the (*) required information where indicated. HTML code is not allowed.

Featured Poll

Do you agree with Mayor Vincent Gray’s decision to enable the Department of Motor Vehicles to issue a driver's license, learner's permit, or identification card to undocumented District residents?