A+ R A-

Blaming Bobby Brown

Rate this item
(150 votes)
Blaming Bobby Brown Courtesy Photo

Fifteen years ago, none of us would have guessed that in 2012, Bobby would be remarried, the father to a young child and (allegedly) sober for years and that Whitney would die alone in the Beverly Hills Hotel with Xanax and an uneaten turkey sandwich by her side. Many had hoped that the end of what seemed to be the toxic Bobby and Whitney marriage would signal the rebirth of the latter's career and her health. That was not to be the case.

Before Real Housewives of Atlanta and Basketball Wives lowered the threshold for what is considered to be acceptable on-screen behavior, there was Bravo's Being Bobby Brown. The hit series, which ran but one fateful season, took a look into the life of the aging R&B star, his children and, most notably, his drug-addled wife Whitney Houston. It was a train wreck and impossible to look away. On one hand, you had the loving father who doted on other kids from the family as much as he did his own, the tender relationship between mother and daughter and the undeniably powerful bond that kept Bobby and Whitney together for 15 years. But then you had the once-powerful couple looking high as a kite, swimming in booze and talking as if they had no concept of cameras and fame (a particular low came via Brown recalling the time he helped his wife pull a stubborn piece of you-know-what from her rectum). For many viewers, the show served as a confirmation: that Negro from Boston had ruined our pretty, pretty princess.

Bobby Brown met Whitney Houston at the 1989 Soul Train Awards, the same year she was booed there by an audience that didn't yet find her pop sound "Black" enough to warrant inclusion in such a Black event. The two very shortly thereafter became inseparable and were married in a 1992 ceremony that made jaws drop across the land. Whitney, as we knew her before Bobby, was classy and stunning and sober. Whitney after the couple's marriage was loud, defiant and, later, troubled. Thus, Brown must have been to blame.

It's curious how few folks considered Whitney's choice of husband to be a reflection of who she was all along. No, I'm not saying that she was always into drugs and always bent on self-destruction. But there has never been any concrete proof that Brown rolled up at that woman's castle on a chariot filled with dope and Marlboros and turned her out. Yet that is the narrative so many of us have clung to for the better part of two decades.

The couple's "Something In Common" was often used as a joke-the something MUST be crack, HA! -but it actually seemed to be a message to those who didn't understand how two people who looked so different from the outside could be in love. This is where the public's inability to understand branding comes in. Both these kids where from the hood, both experienced fame at a very early age...yet one was molded by a svengali who dressed her in gowns and touted her as a Black Miss America who could sing her face off, while the other's wild antics ended up pulling him from a popular boy band and made him a solo star. Bobby touted his isms, Whitney hid hers. But they were there all along.

As dream hampton mentions in her loving lament for the late diva, industry folks always knew that Houston was "more Newark Black church girl than the debutante" Clive Davis sold us. She and Bobby made sense in ways we may not have instantly recognized, but to reduce their story to that of a guy from the wrong side of the tracks getting a good girl hooked on drugs and booze does both parties a great disservice. And it does absolutely nothing to bring Whitney back.

This is a devastating time for Bobby Brown, as he has lost one of the great loves of his life and the mother of his daughter (Brown's father also passed away last December and his mother, in early 2011). For a recovering addict, this is a dangerous space, one that could very easily lure someone back into the throes of substance abuse. As we do not know now and likely never will if Brown truly introduced Whitney to habits that devastated her career and eventually claimed her life, we owe it to him, to her and to Bobbi Kristina NOT to saddle him with the responsibility for the great tragedy that has occurred.


Jamilah Lemieux is the News and Lifestyle editor for EBONY.com.

Last modified on Tuesday, 14 February 2012 22:27

222 comments

  • Glamnewz@gmail.com

    Well written, I couldn't agree more with you. Blaming Bobby and targeting him at a funeral service is not the answer and will not pacify that Whitney and her habits (recovered or not) will no longer be our punchline, black ppl fight/laugh in painful times

    Glamnewz@gmail.com Sunday, 19 February 2012 15:22 Comment Link
  • tasha o

    The news only tells part of the story and most of the time, they leave out the TRUTH. Then you have Bobby's side, Whomever asked him to move side and then the Truth. I say if we were not there to see & hear for ourselves what really happened, then we should just let it go. The media can be so cruel. IF she died due to drugs, SO WHAT. She's not the first nor will she be the last. At this point, all we can do is PRAY. PRAY for her daughter, her mother, her family as we all would want if this happened in our own family. Since when did the people become GOD to Judge anyone of their sins? Just PRAY that your own life is in order when your day comes to be judged...smh. In the end, Whitney has gone on to be with my Jesus & now it's time for the rest of us left here on earth to GET RIGHT or GET LEFT. Now let the church say AMEN. My name is Tasha and I approve this message. Be Blessed.

    tasha o Sunday, 19 February 2012 14:55 Comment Link
  • Emanuel Goodman

    Sad ... Rip whitney... I mourn her death, and the pain of her love ones. Those that blame bobby are brain washed or idiots but most likely both..

    Emanuel Goodman Sunday, 19 February 2012 08:04 Comment Link
  • Nicholas

    People that blame Bobby Brown for Whitney's fate are mislead, bamboozled and in denial. Whitney was protected by the media prior to her marriage to Bobby Brown and that is why we never heard about her doing drugs. Or did we? Whitney was a sexaholic prior to being a alcoholic and participated in many dangerous activities, but we all did. Those within the circle knew of her problems. Whitney Houston was not as innocent as many of you believe and she would tell you that herself, and did. You just did not listen. What Bobby did wrong was not protecting his wife from the media. He should have done a better job at protecting her image as her husband. But for those that had the opportunity to meet Whitney know that no one ran Whitney's life but Whitney and you were not telling Whitney not to do anything, even marrying Bobby Brown. Whitney was a loving beautiful person. I will miss her dearly. But the real tragedy is all of you believing a fantasy you have made up in your own mind(s). So I wont continue to confuse you with some facts, because your mind(s) are already made up.

    Nicholas Sunday, 19 February 2012 07:49 Comment Link
  • lunda

    RIP Whitney .. i'm french west indian and i follow the whitney houston life from outside but i do not agree with u ... Whitney was professionnal since she met bobby brown (as you said) ... everything is over now but we can learn from the past ... from our experience ... from our mistakes ... and the violent attitude of Bobby Brown (the reality show,etc, etc ) is a shame and Whitney follow him on this way ... sad moment for all human being for all african people After Michael Jackson ... Whitney houston two big afro american stars died

    lunda Friday, 17 February 2012 17:54 Comment Link
  • Anne-Marie Hunte

    Something was wrong. It is brutally obvious that with all the money and fame Whitney was not happy within herself. I don't believe any human being can dictate or decide what happy for each other. I believe these two individuals loved each other but due to their own inherent weaknesses weather it was untreated bipolar disorder, this was a toxic relationship each incapable of helping the other. I loved Whitney as an artist. She appeared to be a sweet human being and maybe the love and outpouring of admiration she getting I'm her death and the prayers was what she needed while she was alive. Give me my flowers while I'm alive. Much respect to Whitney and her family. RIP My heart grieves for little Kristina. I can only hope real love surrounds and protects her and she is able to gain the wisdom necessary to carry on great things for herself and humanity
    Hopefully they have a lot in common. God Bless

    Anne-Marie Hunte Friday, 17 February 2012 16:38 Comment Link
  • MsCybergoddess

    Thank you for finally saying what some of us have been saying all along. Most people won't belive you but if they look back at the time when her father went to the drug dealers and told them to stop selling to HER, not to Bobby. This doesn't take anything away from her abilities and the impact that her music has on a lot of people, but it is a fact.

    MsCybergoddess Thursday, 16 February 2012 16:46 Comment Link
  • alicia banks

    bobby was a fatal toxic dreg...

    shame!!!


    http://aliciabanks.xanga.com/759005336/whitney-houston-is-singing-with-angels/

    alicia banks Thursday, 16 February 2012 03:06 Comment Link
  • J

    This is the editor for ebony? "Both these kids where from the hood, both experienced fame at a very early age." I hope ebony is not edited like this...

    J Wednesday, 15 February 2012 18:36 Comment Link
  • Soft Restaurant - Horeca manager

    Oferim solutii software pentru industria Horeca.Soft pentru Restaurant,Bar,Fast food,Club. AB Soft Timsoara, HORECA MANAGER este o solutie software care permite urmarirea, controlul si reglarea activitatilor din firma dumneavoastra prin controlarea de la vanzare la materii prime in timp real. Softul a fost dezvoltat pentru a veni in intampinarea nevoilor aparute in desfasurarea activitatii intr-o locatie HORECA, astfel prin utilizarea monitorului cu TOUCH SCREEN de catre angajati, dumneavoastra aveti un control total asupra afacerii prin: -Scazamantul din stoc dupa retete sau unitar se face in momentul INCASARII MESEI ! -Calculul in timp real al stocurilor de marfa (cantitativ si valoric) - Controlul vanzarilor pe ospatar in timp real (cantitativ si valoric) - Controlul vanzarilor totale in timp real (cantitativ si valoric) - Rapoarte cantitativ

    Soft Restaurant - Horeca manager Wednesday, 15 February 2012 14:45 Comment Link

Leave a comment

Make sure you enter the (*) required information where indicated. HTML code is not allowed.

Featured Poll

Do you agree with Mayor Vincent Gray’s decision to enable the Department of Motor Vehicles to issue a driver's license, learner's permit, or identification card to undocumented District residents?